Sometimes the best advice for moms doesn't revolve around diaper rash remedies or the best time for bedtimes. Sometimes what you need to hear isn't about your child at all. The best advice for moms to take better care of themselves starts at the top, with you:
1. Don't Undervalue Your Worth
For stay-at-home moms especially, you may feel like you're not contributing to your family's bottom line because you're not bringing in a paycheck.
But if you add up all the the many jobs you do on a daily basis, your financial role is very significant.
After all, salary.com's 2013 mom salary tallied up the many jobs moms do and estimated moms would make $113,586 annually if they were paid for all of those jobs. Sometimes the biggest problems with being a stay-at-home mom are how moms tend to negatively view themselves by undervaluing their true worth and contributions. You don't need a dollar sign and numbers on a piece of paper to show your value.
2. Take Time for Yourself
When you're so busy taking care of everyone else, it's easy to forget to take care of yourself. Making sure you have some time to do the things you love is essential to being a happy mom. You don't have to book a luxurious solo getaway to sneak in some much-needed "me" time.
After all, who's going to take care of your family if you're not taking care of yourself?
3. Get Child Care Help
If you're staying at home with the kids all day, you may think it's your job to be their full-time caretaker without ever seeking child care help. Even a mom's day out program that gives you a few hours to yourself while your younger kids get to play with other kids their age or a babysitting cooperative that lets you swap babysitting time with other parents can be a tremendous relief to you.
Don't guilt yourself into thinking you don't deserve some outside help because you stay home. Do you get a lunch break at a 9-5 job? Do you get to lock the door of your office and leave the day's work behind when you go home at a regular job? Do you get to do those same things when you stay home with the kids all day? You need a break and you deserve one.
4. Stop Thinking You Can Do Everything
Bad news everyone. There's no such thing as SuperMom and that's okay. As much as you may want to do everything yourself, you can't. And that's fine too.
There will be days you feel like quitting because you think you're failing as a parent. Your eagerness to do everything may be overshadowed by feelings of frustration, which can lead to feelings of loneliness and disappointment. That's more pressure you've put on yourself than your spouse's impossible boss puts on him at work.
Get help for the big projects that take up your time as well as the smaller tasks like laundry. You'll be able to spend more of your free time with your kids instead of slaving over dusting and constant cooking. You've heard it takes a village to raise a child and you're just one person.
5. Make Your Marriage a Priority
You probably feel like a waitress or even a personal servant to your children.
At the end of the day, all you want to do is relax with your favorite TV show or a good book.
Use the time to unwind with your spouse and continually make your marriage a priority. Plan a fun activity with your spouse today. Enjoy a cheap date together this weekend, even if you have to stay at home. Simply start a conversation with your spouse about a topic other than your kids. You can do it!
Your marriage can easily become that one thing in your day that you put on the back burner. Before you know it, you've disconnected with the person who's your teammate in this kid-raising adventure.