Over the year, the literature of self-improvement has focused on what the experts call self-talk. The concept of self-talk suggests that we often speak negatively about ourselves to ourselves and that this can cause serious emotional damage. Many men struggle with this negative self-talk, and often find themselves, when they do something stupid or thoughtless, repeating a negative self-talk message like , “I am such an idiot.”
The idea of affirmations in self-help literature is all about helping us shift the self-talk from negative to positive in a daily habit of repeating positive statements that affirm the good things we are and the good things we hope to achieve or have. This process helps “program” our minds to think and see things positively.
Positive affirmations are short statements that are repeated regularly (at least daily) to replace negative self-images with positive, nurturing beliefs about ourselves, our family, our career, our personal attributes, and our environment.
Most self-help gurus suggest that we base our affirmations on things we want to change about ourselves. Regular repeating of affirmations about health and wellness can help us lose weight, build body strength and endurance, or motivate us to greater physical activity. Some such affirmations might include “I choose to make healthy choices in what I eat,” or “Healthy foods taste better to me.”
Many self-help experts suggest three steps to creating a meaningful positive affirmation statement. You should:
- Start in the present tense, using words like “I am…” or “I have…”
- Relate what you want as if it already has occurred. For example, “I am at a healthy weight. I only eat when I am hungry.”
- Use positive words, not negative. In the weight loss example, “I only eat when I am hungry” works better than “I don’t eat when I am bored or depressed.”
So, as a father wanting to improve, the following sample affirmations can make a big difference. Having a list that you read out loud daily, or that you memorize and recite regularly, can refocus your mind and energy on being a great father to your children. The more we repeat these affirmations, or others like them, the more we program our thought patterns so that we act like they are present in our lives.
Try a few for the next thirty days and see if you can sense a difference in how you think and feel about your role as a father.
- I am a great dad, and I get better at fatherhood every day.
- My beautiful and healthy family is my greatest asset.
- My greatest legacy in life is the success of my children.
- The more love I give to my family, the more there is for me to receive.
- I deserve love and I get it in abundance.
- I make wise decisions that are beneficial to me and to my family now and in the future.
- I devote time to my personal development every day because I know that I deserve it.
- I set a positive environment for my family at home.
- Every day I am becoming a better dad.
- I always keep my promises to my children.
- I am a great role model for my children.
- I am healthy and full of energy.
- I am a source of positive inspiration for my spouse and my children.
- I love and respect my spouse and my children.
- I am a family man, first and foremost.
- My family relationships are filled with love, joy and fun.
- I strive for well-rounded development in each of my children.
- My marriage and family are the most sacred aspects of my life.
- I am committed to being a forever father in a forever family.
- I am a problem solver. I focus on finding solutions to the problems in my path.
- I see the good in my wife and children.
- I am flexible and tolerant in my relationships at home.
- I understand that habits make a person and I help my children develop good habits.
- I make decisions with an eye to the long term.