How to Be an Elegant Person

Jackie O's Elegance and Grace Can be Achieved with Proper Etiquette and Style

Elegant couple celebrating with champagne
It isn't difficult to be elegant when you have confidence through good manners. Cultura/Twinpix / Getty Images

People who know and show proper etiquette are often perceived as being elegant. Even if you weren't born into an elegant environment, it is something you can learn by watching people you admire and reading guidelines on proper etiquette. And then you need to practice to make it comes as second nature.

Start out being elegant in front of a mirror when you are alone, and then show your friends the "new you." Once you're comfortable with your new public persona, take it with you everywhere.

The Way You Look

There is nothing you can do about the fact that people will judge you by the way you look, so use it to your advantage. You don't have to drain your bank account to look refined. You just have to be wise with your choices.

Tips on refining the way you look:

  • Posture – Stand up straight and hold your head up when you walk. Don't slouch when you sit. your body language says a lot about you.
  • Expression – Don't frown. You don't have to constantly smile, but try to have a friendly look on your face.
  • Attire – Dress appropriately. If you are in doubt about what to wear to a specific event, contact the sponsor or host and find out. Never wear wrinkled or dirty clothing. Take the time to polish your shoes.
  • Makeup – Understated is always better than too much makeup. Start with a clean face and pick one feature to enhance. Most makeup experts advise clients to play up either the eyes or the lips, not both.

    The Way You Speak

    An elegant woman speaks with confidence about topics she knows. She is also a good listener who makes the people she's with comfortable. If you're able to put other people at ease, their impression of you will be positive.

    How to speak with elegance:

    • Smile often and make eye contact.
    • Speak clearly and avoid using slang that isn't familiar to the people you are talking to.
    • Avoid being a drama queen. Don't air all your grievances to everyone you speak with. Save those for your closest friend who can be trusted to keep a confidence.
    • Don't constantly brag about yourself.
    • Don't provide too much information.
    • Be a good conversationalist. Turn the attention to the other person, and she will think you're brilliant.

    The Way You Act

    In order to be perceived as an elegant woman, you must act with dignity and poise. Don't do something childish or silly just to get attention.

    Ways to act in an elegant manner:

    • Refrain from anything scandalous. For example, getting drunk and staggering across a bar is far from being elegant. Stay sober and don't do anything that will embarrass you later.
    • Take classes to better yourself or learn something new.
    • Develop an appreciation for the arts. Attend classical concerts and ballet. Visit museums.
    • Participate in sports and be a gracious sports spectator.
    • Before you travel to a new place, learn the customs and enough of the language to get around.
    • When you are invited to a party, send your RSVP as soon as possible and don't forget to bring a hostess gift.
    • Never forget to send a thank you note.
    • Learn and exhibit proper table manners when dining.
    • Be a good tipper at restaurants, the hair salon, and anywhere else you receive a service.
    • Be kind and generous to others.
    • Be respectful of personal space. Don't crowd people who clearly need more elbow room.
    • Host a get-together for others who have invited you to their homes.