Top Reasons Not to Become a Stay at Home Mom

A picture of a mom with a baby
Being home with your children is rewarding but you have to want to be a stay-at-home mom for the right reasons. Photo © Digital Vision / Getty Images

There are plenty of great reasons to become a stay-at-home mom. Then there are some not-so-great reasons to leave your job behind to stay home with the kids full-time. Before you make a life-changing decision, make sure to analyze the top reasons not to become a stay-at-home mom.


You're stuck in a rut. You're looking for a change to break up your boring routine and give you something new to do.

While being a stay-at-home mom will present you with a new challenge, boredom with the working world isn't a good reason to become an at-home parent.

If you're simply bored with your current situation, look for something new that's not such a dramatic change in your life. Take up a new hobby, enroll in a class that will help you further your career or plan a girls' night to blow off some steam.

Frustrated with Your Job

Your boss just dumped a month's worth of extra work on you and one of your co-workers just ate your lunch out of the refrigerator for the fifth day in a row. You'll probably toy with the idea of screaming, "I quit!" as you run to your car and prepare yourself for your new role as a stay-at-home mom on your drive home.

Frustration won't magically go away when you stay home with the kids. You'll face a new batch of challenges that may make you want to run from the house screaming, "I quit!" as you run to your car and drive back to your old job.

Parenting can be pretty frustrating and that's especially true if you're around your kids all the time. Sure, you adore your kids but the frustration you're feeling at your job isn't a good enough reason to stop working.

Tired of Paying Child Care Costs

Finding great child care is a big concern for working parents.

And that quality child care usually comes at a premium price.

While writing that check hurts your bank account and makes you second guess your decision to work outside of the home, take a look at the flip side. You don't have a need for that expensive child care because you're providing it yourself but your financial restrictions come in the form if one paycheck to take care of your family.

Before you quit your job to stay home, take a look at your finances. It will take some adjustments to get used to living off if one income but if you evaluate your finances before turning in your notice you'll likely be able to make it work. But that pinch of the budget on outside child care shouldn't be your driving reason for wanting to stay home.

Looking for Free Time

You are so tired of being at work all the time. You need more free time, more time to cheer on your kids at their games and more time just for you.

Free time is a balancing act when you're a parent, regardless of whether you work outside of the home or not. If you stay home full-time, you'll find all of those time management tricks you learned in the board room also come into play at home. Staying home won't free up your calendar, you'll simply have a different set of obligations and time constraints on a daily basis.

Staying Home Seems Easier

Regardless of if you're working for a bad boss or you're managing a team of challenging employees, staying home with the kids won't be all sunshine and rainbows either. If you're thinking staying home with the kids will be easier than juggling a lot of deadlines and work stress, you'll be right in many ways and disappointed in other regards.

The stress level will be different, the days will be a new experience for a while and you'll have mixed feelings about your decision at first. What it won't always be is easy.  There will be days you wish your boss was handing you a stack of projects with a tight deadline just because that would be more simple than what you're dealing with as an at-home parent. Yes, some days will be easier than others but not every day will make you feel like a superstar stay-at-home mom.

Tired of People Judging Your Choice of Being a Working Mom

From your mother-in-law to your closest friends, people can be quite vocal about your decision to work outside the home. The continual talk, talk, talking and snarky comments can make you feel like a terrible mother because you're not at home 24/7 with your kids.

Don't let what anyone says sway your decision about working. You need to do what's best for your family, whether it be staying home or working full-time. Falling prey to peer pressure isn't a good enough reason to become a stay-at-home mom and neither is giving into the mommy wars hype. You'll need to go into at-home parenting without reluctance or you'll find yourself resentful of those around you and even of yourself for giving up your job because of someone else's opinion.