6 Secrets to "Divorceproofing" Your Marriage

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Marriage is a journey through life as a couple. When you first get married, life is full of bliss and you can't imagine spending one minute apart from the one that you love. Over time, the new excitement of your partnership starts to fade away, and you get used to living together and the daily routines that you fall into. It is at this stage that some couples get lost in the routine and lose the spark of what brought them together in the first place.

You get busy, and sometimes forget what things were like when you first said "I do." Keeping a marriage strong takes work!

Here are six secrets to making your journey as a married couple a healthy and exciting one:

Open Communication

Communication is an essential element to a thriving marriage. Nobody likes to feel like they are left in the dark with regard to what the other partner is feeling, or with decisions that need to be made in the household. Make it a point to keep your spouse up-to-date with what is going on in your life, and what you are thinking about. Lack of communication leads to couples losing touch with one another, and the possibility of one person thinking that the other is keeping secrets. Make a point to have deep and meaningful conversations, not just talk about the mundane parts of life.

Mutual Respect and Admiration

When you love someone, you should respect and admire that person.

Each partner in the marriage should consider the other person's feelings and what is on their mind. It is perfectly normal to have moments of miscommunication, confusion, and not understanding where the other person is coming from, but two married people need to support and respect each other. If your spouse has an idea that you feel is way in left field, listen to him or her and appreciate that they felt the need to talk to you about it.

Even if you do not agree with your partner, show him or her respect as a person. You must also cherish your spouse and look for qualities in them that you are fond of and appreciate.

Date Nights

The concept of dating should not be lost when you get married. Dating is what brought you together as a couple in the first place. Take time out of your busy lives to get dressed up and spend an evening together as a couple away from home. Romance is what keeps marriages alive, and it should be something you strive for. Date nights should happen at least once a month, and do not have to be fancy or expensive affairs. This is the time where you can have some light-hearted conversation and reunite as a happy couple.

Constructive Disagreements

It is inevitable that when two people live together day in and day out, there are going to be disagreements. One of you will come home from work in a bad mood, or your spouse will want to have a deep conversation when all you want to do is watch TV. It is normal to have disagreements from time-to-time, but they should be constructive and not turn into full-blown arguments. When people argue, nasty things are usually said, and these things can be very hurtful to your spouse.

In the event you find your disagreement turning sour, take a break and cool down before you address the topic again. The happiest marriages are where two people feel that there is power sharing and both are on level ground with each other.

Trust

Trust is the foundation of a healthy relationship. You have to trust your partner if the marriage is to thrive. Your spouse is your partner and there should never be a reason to keep secrets or lie to the one you love. Be open and honest in your relationship, because broken trust is not easy to fix. If you are having financial problems, make sure to get your spouse in the loop so that you can work together to fix the issues. It is also vital to be transparent about your relationships with other people so that it never appears as though you are unfaithful.

When there is trust in a marriage, the union thrives.

Keep Life Fun

Another important secret to a happy marriage is to keep it fun. Your significant other should be your best friend in life and you both should work together to have as much fun as you can during your journey as a couple. Take vacations, find hobbies you both enjoy, and laugh as often as you can. When both parties are happy, anything is possible. 

As you go through life as a couple, it is easy to get wrapped up in the everyday routines and busy schedules. Despite this, you should always take the time to let your other half know that you love and care about them. Step away from the hustle and bustle of life and enjoy some one-on-one time with your spouse. Marriage is hard work, but when you work through the secrets of keeping it alive, you and your spouse will have a better chance of making it through to the very end.

Recommended reading:

Purchase from Amazon the popular book, The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by Dr. John Gottman, PhD or Hold Me Tight by Dr. Sue Johnson.

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